


Everything I've ever done I did it for you

by ghostsandfriends



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: (although not shown), Demons, Drunk! Shane, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Gay, Ghost! Sara, Ghosts, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, Scared Ryan, This is really gooey sorry, protective, shane can see ghosts, they're both stupid idiots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-03
Updated: 2018-06-03
Packaged: 2019-05-17 14:18:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14833884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ghostsandfriends/pseuds/ghostsandfriends
Summary: Something felt out of place for the last few weeks. Ryan could sense it, in the workplace and at home as well. There was an emptiness now, it took him a few moments to recognize the missing piece, a forgotten fragment of his memory he hadn’t bothered to look out. Shane had been gone.





	Everything I've ever done I did it for you

It happened over the course of a few weeks, everything was normal. Usual trips to haunted locations, random conversations about anything and stupid arguing over things that never really mattered then it started to slowly fade. He saw and less of Shane, the only time Shane ever really spoke to him was in passing. “Andrew, have you been talking to Shane at all recently?” 

“Well, yeah. Why?” The blond answered.

“I don’t know...it’s just I haven’t really talked to him in a while.” 

“That’s kind of weird dude, you guys always do everything together. Anything happen recently?” 

“No,” Ryan responded, trying to pinpoint any important event that could cause the collapse of a friendship. “I can’t remember if I said something wrong or anything at all that would get him pissed enough not to talk to me.” There was a small sigh before he walked off, rubbing the tiredness out of his eyes and thoughts flowed through his head. 

**-**

Three weeks had been too much for Ryan. “I’m sorry,” he blurted out when he saw his friend alone in the breakroom. The door was locked behind him and Ryan just wanted a moment alone with him. He needed to know what was wrong, what he did wrong. He needed his friend back.

“Excuse me?” Shane asked, holding a shark mug while pouring an unusual amount of creamer in. It started to overflow due to the lack of concentration. 

“I don’t know what I did, I know I can be a jerk sometimes but I’m just playing around and I didn’t know if I said something to upset you but I’m sorry.” 

“Ryan,” Shane bit his lower lip, thinking of a response, putting the mug up, “where is this coming from?” 

“I...You haven’t really talked to me in the last few weeks and I thought that...well, I thought that I did something wrong to upset you or make you hate me.”

“Dude, you haven’t said anything wrong. I love you enough to put up with the spirit box. If that isn’t a devotion to friendship then I have no idea what is.” Ryan laughed a second later, hugging the taller one. It was normal, at least for now.

****-**   
**

“For fuck sake, I was just trying to protect him, I thought maybe if I drifted far away enough it would be safe,  _ he would be safe _ .” Shane was nearing a panic attack from overthinking. His pale, ghostly figure of a friend, Sara, sat and listened to him. He took off his glasses, rubbing his eyes. She tried to comfort him, although Shane really couldn’t really feel her touch. 

**-**

Sara had been there longer than anyone. It was a rare mysterious case of circumstances that caused her death back in 1937, but ever since then the dame had wandered around the same hotel complex that had been converted into an apartment complex in the 2000’s. Ever since Shane moved in out of college, she was there. Her soul was crushed, her pale eyes seeking comfort, Sara’s presence always left a cold uneasiness with Shane until he started to talk to her and grow attached to the girl. Her short cut with strands of coiled hair faded red lipstick and smudge mascara along with the torn lilac dress that had blood stains that would never leave. Shane never grew close to one of the dead as he did with Sara. 

“You need to talk to him, sit him down and explain. He’ll understand,” she says lightly. 

“He would hate me if I ever told him about the truth. ‘ _ Hey Ryan, turns out you’re not insane, I’m just an asshat and could see ghosts and demons this whole time’  _ He’d probably cancel the show and never talk to me again.” 

“He’s too attached to you as you are to him. I see it whenever you bring him over for drinks. Ryan would never just end something as important as this. He could understand.” 

“What is there to understand? I’ve lied and cheated him out of proof in order to protect his ass and that everything has been a lie since the whole show started?” 

“You were already friends before any show started hon, if he knows you he’ll understand.” 

**-**

The next morning, Ryan brought coffee. The guilt inside Shane’s chest had planted and started to spread out, making his stomach churn sometimes when he felt that he should just tell Ryan. The worst that could happen is that Ryan could hate him. Yeah...Shane didn’t know what he would do with himself if that happened. 

“That is total horseshit,” Ryan stood in the breakroom, his arms crossed as he was narrowly smiling at the taller one. Shane laughed along too. 

“How could I be lying? Jesus call my dad if you really want to see if it’s true.” Shane had been telling a story from his childhood, a long forgotten camping trip with his dad where they had run into a mother bear and her cubs. It was a nice observation and they had been far enough to not be noticed or hopefully, attacked. Shane imagined if Ryan had been there he would've shit his pants. 

“I’m surprised you didn’t get mauled you, stupid oaf.” 

“Oh please, you would have just stood there scared shitless anyway.” 

“Yeah! No shit, in front of the world’s dangerous animal, who wouldn’t be?”

“Hippos are more dangerous than bears Ryan, look it up if you don’t believe me.” He huffed and just smiled. The two broke out laughing. “Hey, what would happen if we ran into ghost bear on one of your ghostly trips?”

“Well, it’s a ghost. Hopefully, it wouldn’t be able to maul me, but the only bear I ever want to run into is Paddington.” 

“Winnie the Pooh is a far superior icon.” 

“You’re out of your league Madej.” 

**-**

Shit. Shane flopped onto the couch when he got back to his apartment. Sara was there, looking at him strangely as he kept his face buried beneath some pillows. “What’s going on hon?” 

“I love him, Sara.” His voice was muffled from the pillows. He sat up and rubbed his eyes. “I’m so stupid! I cheat and lie to him and now I have to be in love with him!” He groaned and sat back. 

Sara sat next to him, running her fingers through his hair. He could hardly feel the touch but it was a nice gesture. “When did this all start?” 

“Well, I don’t really know? I mean we’ve always been friends, as soon as we started working together. And we grew a little closer because of the show and now...Now I’m gonna ruin everything.” 

“You are not going to ruin anything, Shane. It’s not wrong to have feelings like these you know.” 

“Yeah I know, but I don’t want to ruin our friendship. Besides, I’m sure he’s straight as an arrow anyhow so there’s really no point-” 

“Stop being stupid and calm down. You just need to talk to him is all. He could be feeling the same way you know.” Shane thought about that. God, Ryan having a crush on him? It was enough to make him blush and bury his face in his hands. 

“Maybe you’re right. I need to sleep this off.” 

“Get some food and we’ll watch something,” Sara suggested. “It Shark week on the Discovery channel.” 

**-**

Shane couldn’t hide to much of his personal attachment to Ryan at work anymore. The last few months flew by in some hazed blur and all Shane remembered was that Ryan was in the center of all of it. New locations for new episodes meant the Shane only thought about protecting Ryan from any unwanted attention from dangerous figures. It was a true crime season thank god, no demons but a lot of murderous dead people. Shane learned when he was younger how to get rid of any unwanted presence. Apparently, it had been a gift in the Madej family for a few generations. There was this family heirloom, a charm of sorts. His mother gave it to him when he was younger because of an incident where he had ran into a few not-so-friendly spirits. Shane couldn’t sleep when he was younger, thinking of what had happened over and over again. He didn’t know exactly what it was, a white glass charm with something coiled around the outside of it. But it protected him. It shook when there was danger and heated when something bad or close to him was about to happen. Without it, Shane probably would have been dead. 

“Hey Madej,” Andrew joked around. “You good?” 

“Yeah,” he said as calmly as he could, he had been looking at Ryan talk to a few other coworkers for god knows how long by now. 

“Do you and Bergara-”

“No,” he blurted out. 

“It’s okay dude, relax. It just- well everyone knows how much you guys look after each other.” 

“Yeah,” he huffed out.  _ Look after each other, god.  _ Shane wanted to go home and curl up on the sofa and forget that this interaction ever happened. 

“It’s fine if you feel-” 

“How do you know what I feel?” 

“Relax Shane, I’m your friend. I would never-” 

“Thanks, Andrew but just please lay off of it.” Yep, he gonna eat a whole tub of ice cream tonight and sleep this conversation off. Andrew nodded and walked off, leaving Shane feeling like he was going to puke and collapse at the same time.  _ Jesus, I need to go home.  _

**-**

“Come on Madej, please,” Ryan begged. Shane already slung his bag over his shoulder and he had bags under his eyes. Coffee flavor tonight then, with little espresso beans in the ice cream. “Dude, it’s just a few drinks.” 

“And I’m already exhausted.” 

“But we haven’t gone out in forever man!” God, was Ryan always this whiny or did he just tune out half of Ryan’s whimper. Probably just tuned them out. 

“I’m going home, Ryan. Besides, if I was going to go out with you, I’d probably end up driving your ass home.” 

“Not true!” The shorter crossed his arms and grabbed a jean jacket off of his desk chair. “I’m not-” 

“With your height, it’s easier to get intoxicated so…”

“Fuck you, Shane,” he laughed. “I am 5’ 10”.”

“Well, that only when you wear your special shoes, buddy,” he tapped the top of his head and smiled. “See you tomorrow.” 

“Yeah, you big oaf! Try not to get killed on the way home by pissing off ghosts or demons!” He yelled as Shane was already halfway across the parking lot. 

“Try not to wet your pants over noises that don’t sound like voices!” Shane yelled back. As he pulled out he could see Ryan flipping him off. 

**-**

Ryan thought this was a good idea. If Shane wasn’t willing to go out then he might as well bring the party to him. It wouldn’t be the first time they’ve gotten wasted at Shane’s place and ended the night by passing out on Shane’s couch watching a nature documentary. He knocked on the door, hearing a clatter behind. 

“ _ Relax _ ,” he heard Shane say on the other side. The door opened a crack as he saw his friend’s face. 

“Ryan thought you went out.”

“Y-Yeah.”  _ God,  _ Ryan thought,  _ why am I so nervous, it’s just Shane.  _ “Well I felt bad so I bought us a few drinks and um...is everything alright in there.” 

“Oh yeah, just dropped a few books.”  _ Okay, Madej, that’s the worst lie anyone’s ever heard.  _

“Can I come in?” He looked sheepish, a little off. Shane’s seen nervous Ryan but this was a little different. Ryan felt stupid coming over.  _ I should just leave- _

“Yeah, of course.” 

The atmosphere felt awkward for the both of them. Ryan wanted to leave and Shane wanted to curl up into a ball and scream into a pillow. 

“So…” Ryan held up beers. 

A half hour later they were wasted. “You know I haven’t felt this normal in a while,” Shane giggled. Usually, he liked to yell when he was drunk but he was too tired to care. He felt safe and fine for the first time in a while, and he was with Ryan. 

“You good buddy?” Ryan giggled.

He nodded, closing his eyes. “I felt bad for a while Ryan, I’m sorry by the way-” he hiccuped at the end, closing his eyes again.    
“Sorry? For what?” 

“I feel bad, I’m sorry.” He hardly controlled the words coming out of his mouth, he just wanted the guilt to be gone and if Ryan hated him then he wouldn’t be able to do anything. “I lied.” 

“Lied? About what?” 

“About the show silly!” 

Ryan had never been more confused before. “What?” 

“I saw them, I see them, some of them are nice but some of them don’t like you and I don’t like them wanting to hurt you.” Ryan looked at him strangely for a little bit.    
“You sure you’re okay big guy?” 

“No, I don’t like them, Ryan. They say mean things like murdering and I would never want to hurt you. I’m not c-crazy I swear. I’ll show you. Sara!” 

“Shane.” 

“Sara, please.” 

“Shane,” a female voice whispered and Ryan practically jumped out of his seat. “I don’t think this is a good idea.”    
“Madej.” 

“Sara please.” It took a few seconds but a ghostly figure of a girl in a ripped dress appeared from the darkened bedroom. Ryan nearly shit himself as he was up on the couch. “This is my friend, Sara. She’s nice she won’t hurt you.” 

“Shane,” Ryan said breathlessly. “What the hell?” Sara looked a bit timid as if she didn’t really trust anyone else than Shane. She tried to smile at Ryan without fighting him. 

“It’s nice to finally meet you, Ryan. Shane mentions you all the time.”

“I need another drink.”

**-**

Morning came and Shane woke up with a headache. Sara was asleep in his armchair and Ryan was passed out on the other side of the couch. He came too in a few and Jesus fuck Shane started to remember what happened last night. 

“Ugh god,” Ryan sat up and glared at Shane. “You have some explaining to do.” He scratched the back of his head. God. 

“Yeah…” 

It took them awhile, Shane made them both coffee and tried to calm himself. 

“Start from the beginning.” They sat at his table, Ryan with his arms crossed and glaring. 

“Okay.” So he spilled it all. He told him everything. How he could see spirits he would rather not see, the charm, his acting and its only intent. He told him about Sara and everything and how every haunted location was hell but it was fun with him and how he hoped Ryan didn’t hate him by the end of it. 

There were a few moments of silence. 

“I don’t… I get that you’ve been trying to protect me, but god Shane why couldn’t you tell me?” 

“You’d hate me and never want to see me again like you probably want to do now. I don’t blame you Ryan, I’m such a jerk and-” 

“Oh my god shut up you doof.” Ryan walked over and cupped Shane’s face in his hands and- wait Shane wasn’t sure what was happening. Oh yeah, Ryan was kissing him. It took him a few seconds to get the gist of it but he opened his mouth and wrapped his arms around Ryan. He felt Ryan move closer to him and felt his arms move around to the back of his neck as he moved closer and closer. He pulled away after a minute. 

“Thank you for protecting me but there wasn’t a need to lie.” 

“I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t be sorry you idiot. I’m not mad at you. Although, I’m assuming that you’ll still deny ghost on the show.” 

“Well yeah,” he scoffed. “It'll be boring without me and you know it Bergara.” He liked seeing Ryan chuckle stupidly and kiss his cheek. Shane couldn’t help but pull him closer and kiss him over again. Ryan pulled away and looked up at a tired Sara as she rubbed her eyes. 

“Oh please don’t stop at my expense.” She laughed. “At least I was right,” she smiled at Shane. 

“What is she talking about?”    
“Oh, nothing, it’s just I’ve been kind of pining after you for a little bit.” 

“God you’re a doof,” Ryan smiled and kissed him again. 

The world felt a little warmer to Shane and it wasn’t just the sunlight coming from the window. 

**Author's Note:**

> This was a rewrite of my old fic 'through your eyes' so if it looks familiar that's why. Thank you for reading! Please leave comments, they give me the will to write more please please leave comments. Thanks!


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